Computer Definitions
Make your own free website on Tripod.com
Computer Definitions

A, B, C, D, E, F, G, H, I, J, K, L, M, N, O, P, Q, R, S, T, U, V, W, X, Y, Z



___________

A

Alpha (adj.): First stage of software testing for getting user feedback. Latin for "doesn't work."


B

BASIC (n.): A programming language. Related to certain social diseases in that those who have it will not admit it in polite company.

Beta (adj.): Second stage of software testing, done shortly before it's released. Latin for "still doesn't work."

Bug (n.): Undocumented feature


C

Compatible (adj.): Gracefully accepts erroneous data from any source.

Computer science (n.): The science of solving today's problems tomorrow.

Computer scientist (n.): Someone who fixes things that are not broken.

Cyberspace (n.): A consensual hallucination experienced daily by billions of legitimate operators, in every nation.


D


E


F


G


H

Hardware (n.): The parts of a computer system that can be kicked


I


J


K

Keyboard (n.): Instrument used to enter errors into computer.


L


M

Maintenance-free (n.): Latin for "when it breaks, it can't be fixed"


N


O


P

Perl (n.): A programming language that looks the same before and after RSA encryption.

Printer (n.): A tool consisting of three main parts: the case, the jammed paper tray and the blinking red light.

Program (n.): A spell cast over a computer, turning input into error messages.


Q


R

Reference Manual (n.): Object that raises the monitor to eye level. Also used to compensate for that short table leg.


S

Scheduled Release Date (n.): A carefully calculated date determined by estimating the actual shipping date and subtracting six months from it.


T


U

Upgrade (n.): Latin for "take old bugs out, put new ones in"


V


W

Windows (n.): The ultimate triumph of marketing over technology


X


Y


Z

___________